Missing home

Today I moved all my stuff to the other side of the country. I feel lonely, bored and confused. Two weeks ago I couldn't wait to move out and start this new journey. Last week the anxiety kicked in. And three days ago until now I was extremely sad. Being such an family oriented person, I knew I was going to miss them so much. But now I feel a little hole in my heart. Tears are going down my cheeks, and I'm not sure how I will fall asleep tonight. Perhaps watch movies until my eyes cannot stay open any longer. All I want to do is pack my bags and go back home. when I went abroad for a year it was so easy to leave, and now it isn't…why? I will try to look for other things to do tonight. Why can't I live at home forever. I guess once I get into my routine, start school and make new friends I will be alright. But for now my heart is aching and I'm missing home terribly. 

I guess I forgot to mention that I actually found a room! It's not too big, decent size, fits all of my crap. bad thing, I have to share the bathroom and kitchen. But having that on my own was just too expensive. It's close to the city centre, central in the city and close to the university I will be attending. 

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Life is beautiful

We all have days that we are just not feeling it. Sometimes it is already when you wake up that you have the feeling today is not your day. Well, I am here to tell you that today is your day, and that you are blessed beyond your imagination. These are just little reminders on how to enjoy life everyday. 

Post detox

This post is later than planned, but due to personal circumstances I was not able to update. 

So last week I did a 5 day detox, just to try it out. I did not make use of any professional guidance, but did my research on the internet and the library and found the right recipes and tips. 

Overall it was harder than I thought it would be. The most difficult day was definitely day 2, and maybe day 3. During day 2 I thought about quitting like a 1000 times. My body was craving carbs and peanutbutter. I was wondering why I was doing this and found about 100 excuses why I should just stop and have a big feast. I cannot even put into words how bad I wanted to stop and why on earth I thought this was a good idea. I decided to just go to bed, as this would take my mind of the thing that was on my mind: Fooood!

However, I did not stop, and as this day went by it became easier. I noticed that during the week I became less present, as my head was kind of empty. I didn't really interact and felt sleepy.  However, I could feel that my body was 'enjoying' it. And one positive outcome was my face. It started glowing and when I told my mom that I did a detox the past week she said she could tell by my face. It was more shining and looked healthy. 

After the detox I noticed that I my stomach was full much quicker, however after a week I have my before appetite again.  ( It was a nice feeling, I think I will try to eat smaller meals. I have the tendency to eat three big meals because I like that feeling. However, this can result in an addiction, and you can make those three big meals into 6 each day. Therefore eating smaller portions will be much better for me personally.)

I would recommend something like this after your work or school is over. Take a week off, have no meetings or gym appointments and treat yourself on raw spinach, lettuce and apples. I will do this again when I feel I had a busy period or had too much junk to eat. For next time I will plan something to do on day 2. Because I was by myself I had the temptation to go to the store and buy food. Being around people that are aware of your detox, they will be able to motivate you and stop you from taking decision you will regret later on.  

(And for the people wanting to loose weight by a detox, I lost like two pounds, but they are back again )

Update

Later I will write about my experience so far with this detox. Something personal happenend this week which left me unable to focus on school activities or my blog. I'm sorry but will update you later. Huge hugs and blessing <3

Someone sent this to me today and thought it would be nice to share...hope that wherever you are, you have a wonderful day

I have been ridiculously (is that a word) busy. And so many things are happening at the same time, it's crazy. First I want to give an update which is kind of good news. My grandfather was diagnosed with prostate cancer, yet has quite a good diagnosis. He refused any kind of treatment, which is OK, he is almost 90 years old. Instead he's getting hormones, and all his levels dropped and he is simply doing just wonderful. Here I was so frightened to loose him, but for now he is actually healthy. He can still live on his own, does groceries on his bike, goes to the chess-club. I was so afraid having to say goodbye to him, and the opposite happened, he is in great shape! That is such a big thing that I couldn't be more thankful for.

London!

Well furthermore I got to travel to London in December for school, to attend a conference. It was great, and I just love that city. All the Christmas decorations were out, and I just finished the semester, so no better start to my well deserved break. 

Look at the pretty-ness!

At the moment I am searching for an internship, which is a pain in the butt.  It is so difficult, so many organisations and places I would love to go to. Next to that I'm attending college full-time, trying to squeeze in gymtime 3-4x a week and still working on school when I get back to my dorm. Overall, I am just too busy, or at least thats how it feels. My head is just full of stuff and I really need to take it a step back and find some peace and quiet. Which is more difficult than it sounds, especially when you don't have the time for it. My weekends consists of doing NOTHING, literally. I try to plan nothing so my body and mind can relax for two days, to gain back fuel for the next week. 

 Don't forget to take a step back every once in a while (or every day if you can/want to) and think about what is happening in your life, during your days and in your mind. What are your dreams? What are you doing at the moment to make them come true? Who do you love or care for? Do they know? I find out almost everyday that 24hrs is just not enough...yet we often do not make the most out of it. Life is so simple yet so complicated. Do what makes you happy. That's all. 

And if you want to take a time out of working, doing homework, going to classes, working at your office job, or WHATEVER you do, I have so tips

- Paint your nails (yourself, or treat yourself and get a mani/pedi)

- Go to a park, pack some fruit, walk around and sit on a bench. Inhale the fresh air, look around, life's good :)

- Find an 'impossible' recipe online, go to the store and get the ingredients. Prepare and make a picture of it. How much does it (not) look as the recipe? Maybe it tastes delicious!

- Go to the beach (my favourite place in the world ) sit in the sand and let the wind blow in your face. Close your eyes and listen to the waves. You can also go to a lake or river, it's so peaceful. Don't forget your little picknick!

- Simply do nothing. It is probably harder then it sounds


Don't count every hour in the day, but make every hour in the day count
&

A happy heart makes the face cheerful (proverbs 13) Have a great and peaceful Sunday!