Body image

I was talking with one of my friends the other day about how our view on what we perceive as ''beautiful'' has changed over the years. In the early days people were rich and fertile when they carried some extra pounds, and now it is exactly the opposite. I have to admit I let it affect myself more than I would like to admit. 

Looking at this picture, I absolutely love it. Girls in different sizes, with an smile on their face. Isn't that whats important in life? But then how did we get such different expectations on our looks. Why do we advertise that people with a size 0 are happier and more successful in life, let alone healthier. In the end it is about taking care of your own body and fueling it with the energy and nutrients it needs to grow strong. It is such a shame that the media is telling all of us to loose some pounds. Maybe for health reasons yes, not for someone else. But when we are healthy and happy, there is no need to change anything about our looks! Why do magazines and celebrities show us so many unhealthy choices? Our body is a temple, we only have one and need to care for it. 

I found this picture on the internet and wish I'd found it when I was younger. Read it, and perhaps save it onto your computer. Have a look at it every once in a while. I made a list of the things I like about my body, and some things I am insecure about. I focus on the things I like, even though that is harder than point out your 'negative' sides. 

At last I want to say that every person is beautiful, unfortunately the media has created this 'perfect' human being that does not exist but we should all strive for. This is sad and it takes a lot for a person to feel comfortable in their own skin. When I notice an insecure person, I like to give them a compliment about something. A genuine one. It can literally save a person from throwing up, or not eating their dinner that night. Tell a random stranger or a distant friend this week a positive compliment. This might be the only positive thing they will hear that week. 

With love,

a not size 0 -Jessica

How to stay positive

I think it is part of human nature to have our ups and downs. It is normal to sometimes feel discouraged, not that motivated or just not feeling like doing anything. However, this period should not take too much time, leaning towards other causes, e.g depression. 
Overall I get asked often how I always carry a smile (your best accessory!!) on my face and barely show any negative emotions. I think that is part of several reasons.

1) I'm a happy, harmonious person and dislike negative emotions. That is part of my   character. I do always look at the bright side of life.
2) Past experiences. 
3) People you surround yourself with.
4) Changing negative emotions to positive ones

So the first one is kind of in my genes, at least that is how I view it. Just like some people are negative, some have a more positive outlook. 

The second reason is the experiences we have been through shape us, in my case I became a happier person, because life is not as bad as it seems. I have struggled with depression, an eating disorder and social anxiety. And it will and still is be part of me, but I do not allow it to change my mood (or try to). It is a decision you can make yourself. Am I going to let my social anxiety live my life or am I going to stand above it and do something about it. If you are not liking the situation, you are the person that can make a change.

Thirdly I'd like to address how you are influenced by the people around you, consciously and unconsciously. I also had to find that out myself, but I avoid hanging out with negative minded people. Simply because they bring you down yourself. 

(I have a fellow student in my little class who is always negative, about everything. I don't really listen to what he says, goes in one ear and out another, because it used to bother me a lot)

So make the change! 'Delete' those people in your social environment. You don't have to start ignoring them, but you can eat your lunch somewhere else. 

At last I want to stress that it is a learning process. If you see someone who you define as beautiful, 'skinny' (i'd rather say fit) don't think that you look awful and start aiming at looking just like her. Instead think, she looks great. And leave it to that. You don't know how she feels on the insight, which is so much more important. Feeling happy and positive starts on the inside, and not fitting a size 0. Feel good on the inside, and it will show on the outside. 

This doesn't mean that you will feel happier one day to another. But you have to learn to not let your negative emotions and thoughts overrule. Every positive person has negative emotions, its part of life. But it is up to you what to do with them. Go to the gym and get rid of your frustrations. Or talk or cry about it, believe me, you will feel better.

From one happy person to another